just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
