god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
