I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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