someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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