So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
