You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize
