So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
