At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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