Where is the hickey?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
