at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
