I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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