Well douche your snatch and let's go!
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
