That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
