How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
