using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Randomize
