You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
