Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I look better un-naked...
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
