so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I didn't notice because vodka
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
