Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
