Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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