Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
