i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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