By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Can I color on your dick again?
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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