I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
