I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize