If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
