The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
