you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
