ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
