and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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