She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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