Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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