doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
