so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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