woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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