Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
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