i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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