Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
