I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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