I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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