Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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