She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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