i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
As shirtless as possible
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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