I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
