it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
