We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
did i walk over a car last night?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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