i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
