Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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