I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize