they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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