i think my tv is drunk
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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